Wednesday, May 07, 2008

It's Ready in a landslide!

When you think of people winning elections with 100% of the vote, infamous names like Saddam Hussein, Fidel Castro, and Joseph Stalin come to mind.

Add to that list, yours truly, Jeff Ready.

That's right. In fact, I take it one step further. In my first public election, I won 100% of the vote, not once, but twice. See the results for yourself:

Ah but that's not all. As you can see, I received 149 votes in my precinct, White River #12. If I take a look at other vote getters in this precinct, I notice the following:

So while I cleaned up, none of the candidates running for president received as many votes as I did. This is clearly an indication of the leadership people see in me--a mandate, if you will.

I can sense your doubt. Don't make me throw you in the gulag.

In fact, on the entire White River 12 precinct ballot, only our incumbent governor, Mitch Daniels received more votes than me with 160 votes. Better watch out Mitch, I'm gunning for you!

What's even better is that these other fools now have to run in a general election where votes will be split up even more, yet I craftily choose to run for offices that are voted on during the primary only. So 100% of the vote it is. I pledge to use my new found power for good, not evil. Mostly. Or something.